Breaking Up With a Friend

Breaking Up With a Friend

It’s never easy breaking up with a friend, especially if you’ve been two peas in a pod for as long as you can remember. However, sometimes moving on is required- especially if it’s been a long-time coming. 

Breaking up with a friend needs to happen; Particularly if you’ve been trapped in a toxic friendship, you find yourself questioning your worth when they’re around, or you no longer resonate with one another. Other reasons can include individual differences, previous hurt/anger, or merely a time for needed growth.

The “breaking up and moving on” process doesn’t need to be scary, nor does it need to leave either party feeling hurt, angry, or spiteful. In fact, as two mature adults- you’ll understand why this breakup is necessary, and you can begin to let go and branch out into your life with love and happiness. (Instead of regret and hurt.) Continue reading to learn more!

Understand Why You Need to Break Up

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By profoundly understanding why breaking up with your friend is necessary, you’ll find yourself content and firm in your decision. So when Saturday night rolls around, and you’re missing those “wine/girl-nights,” you can remind yourself why you chose to move on.

Expressing How You Feel Helps

Whether you share a few words with a close family member, professional therapist, or during your journaling session, expressing how you feel about the situation can take a load off your chest almost immediately.

Clear Your Mind

Expressing how you feel helps you understand that breaking up with your friend is the right thing to do; And in the same token, it’ll clear your mind of any worries or concerns you have regarding the friendship.

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Remain Realistic

When you’re expressing how you feel, remain realistic regarding the situation. Avoid blaming one side; instead, try to see things from a mutual perspective.

Be Truthful

It’s easy for our ego and lack of understanding (-regarding previous situations, especially if we feel hurt) to want us to spin the truth. Reality is, the truth may be far from what we imagine. This is when expressing how you feel can help you determine and genuinely understand the breakup’s reasons.

Helps With Deciding The Outcome

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Once you can understand the truth behind your decision, it’ll help you significantly with choosing the best outcome for you. For example, you might decide:

  • To put your differences aside and grow together moving forward;
  • That breaking up with a friend is the best choice;
  • You need a break from one another, but will remain in contact every-so-often;
  • History can’t be overlooked, so wholly removing each other from your lives is best;
  • It was all a misunderstanding, and you’ll remain in contact.

You’ll Easily Be Able to Elaborate To Your Friend

With a clear mind, deep understanding, and an ideal outcome, explaining to your friend that you’ve decided to move on from them will be smoother. It’s better to understand why you’ve decided to break up, so you can answer any questions and stick to your guns if they (for example) beg for forgiveness.

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Communication Is Key

Ghosting” tends to be the easiest way in which breaking up with a friend can helpbut we don’t recommend you do this, as it’s immature and selfish. Instead, communicating with your friend in a public and safe space is ideal.

By communicating with your friend about your concerns, issues, and feelings, you can help yourself by getting things off of your chest, and also help them with understanding the situation.

So long as you remember to keep the conversation less blameful and more future-focused, communicating honestly is critical to quickly being able to break up with a friend. Communication is key.

Distract Yourself (Keep Yourself Busy)

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The loss of a person in your life can be painful to familiarize yourself with at first, especially if you’re used to (or dependent on) their presence. But by distracting yourself and keeping yourself busy, you’ll find this process to be far less painful.

Breaking up with a friend is an excellent opportunity to begin focusing on yourself and regaining some self-love into your life (even if you think you have enough already.)

Find below a list of activities you should do to keep yourself busy and avoid dwelling on the break up with your friend:

  • Visit family
  • Hang out with old friends
  • Meet new people/friends
  • Attend new social groups/events
  • Meditate
  • Take up a new hobby
  • Do that “one thing” you keep telling yourself you’ll do tomorrow 😉
  • SELF-CARE DAY
  • Focus on your career/study/health/growth
  • Binge-watch Netflix (-not for too long though)
  • Paint, visit museums or take yourself on a date

Don’t let breaking up with your friend stop you from having fun, happiness, and living life!

Be Grateful For The Lessons

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No matter what has happened in your friendship that has led to you breaking up with them, it’s important to remain grateful for the lessons it’s taught you.

Did your friendship teach you how to love unconditionally? Was a need for deeper self-love the main message behind this friendship? Did it teach you to forgive and let go?

Find the lessons and meanings that you’ve learned in this breakup of friendship; So you can move on feeling grateful but can remain mindful of what to avoid in the future.

Delete, Block, or Keep?

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If you’re unsure whether to keep your ex-friend on your friend’s list, delete them, or block them entirely, it will depend on the outcome of your friendship.

When two friends have been able to break up peacefully, keeping each other on your friends’ list doesn’t need to be a sin. However, if you’re finding it hard to move on, we recommend that you delete them.

Blocking them is only necessary if you feel uncomfortable about them reaching out, Stalking your page, or if you’ve left each other on a bitter-note.

As you can see, it truly does depend on the circumstances. But as a tip from Eyliza:

“Nobody in the past needs to remain in the present with you, moving forward.”

– EYLIZA
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Eyliza
Content writer and digital marketer, changing millennials lives one article at a time.
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